WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT BY JOYS OYEDEPO

Have you ever felt like the outcast?
...like everyone gets blessed but you?
You seem to be doing the same things but God expects so much more from you but not from them?

Everyone's getting married, having kids, buying houses, making impact, and then there's you,
sitted in the corner,
counted as nothing.
It seems like no matter how hard you try, you will never be accepted. At least, not like them.
They've made it far past where you ever could reach, and they never forget to say it.
They're in your face, they're on your tv screens, everywhere you turn;
and the only place there's solace, the only place you would never be compared, is in the corner when you're sitted on the floor in reverence of your King.
That is the only place you are never judged,
the only place your hope is alive.
Yes, you may speak on your next steps or your little successes and they laugh in your face, reminding you how hard you fell the last ten times you tried;
but still, that light, you see in Him.
---
Hope.
Undying hope.
Now, thats all we could ask for.
Because someday, one day, that hope would grow into something.
It could grow into faith.
Maybe even, a victory.
That hope, now, that's something to cling to.
It's my light at the end of the tunnel,
my strength when all I see is death.
That light,
It's my fight when I'm weak,
my victory when none seems in sight.
That light,
yes, that light,
that's my undying fire.
That light,
that is the fire that keeps me warm,
the power that keeps me pressing,
and the last crawl I get to make to the light.
That light,
yea, that little light,
that's all of the Word, that I have in me.

WORDS TO NEVER SAY TO A WAITING COUPLE

       The world calls them ;the infertile couple' because they couldn't conceive a child in a year or more,i call them the waiting couple,waiting for a miracle,waiting for the day the sun will shine on them,but until then,they hold unto hope and blend in like it doesn't hurt.
        That couple is i and my husband,waiting for us is an uncomfortable situation,it causes anxiety and worry,however,we have remained strong through it all,my husband (i call him booboo)always reminds me that we are in this together,he has been by backbone ever since.We nhave been trying to conceive for 6years now,and it hasn't been a walk in the park,we have tried different things,spent almost all our savings on medical procedures,fasted and prayed and still,we still dont have our dream in our hands yet,so now we are just waiting,holding on for our breakthrough,for we are persuaded it will come to pass.
         In our years of waiting,we have heard some of the darndest comments and suggestions by people that claim they care,well maybe they do,but these comments have caused more harm than good to us,so i have listed a few of them below and will be bringing you more in my subsequent posts.
                              
1. When will you conceive
        people expect us to go about mourning and wailing about our inability to conceive,especially me,because im the woman (weaker vessel)and im also the playful one but guess what?we are human too,we love to talk,play,party and have some fun just like every other couple. I have had people come up to me to ask when i will conceive.?well...i dont know,i wish i can open my abdomen and tell my womb to conceive but until it happens,please never ask a waiting couple when they intend to conceive,THEY DONT KNOW!
                                
2. You can have my child
          This happens mostly in the African culture,people come to you offering their child or wards to replace your unborn children.Nothing is wrong with that,but allow us or any other waiting couple to make that decision,do not try to force it,it takes alot of preparation for a waiting couple to make a decision on adoption,until they voice it,never offer a child to them.
                                  

3. Have you been praying at all?
           Of course,the only thing we or a waiting couple does after all is said and done is pray and hope for a miracle,and that is why this question does more harm than good to us,it makes me feel like all my praying is  not working thus i tend to loose faith in my prayer and subsequently loose the only thing i am holding unto.HOPE
                                
4. I pity you
           Many people are guilty of this comment,even though it may come from a sincere heart but never show a waiting couple or say that you pity them,they want to feel normal and blend in,most people don't say it out but their attitude shows it and that simply is stigma,remember action speaks louder than words,show them you care but don't show them you pity them or how worried you are,THEY ALREADY KNOW.Do not add to the hurt they feel already.
                                  
             Waiting can be fun only if people learn to say the right things at the right time.There are however many comments to never say to a waiting couple.we will explore more of that in my next post.Lets paint the world with love.